I love a challenging hike, one that pushes my limits and scares me a little. Whether it’s the gradient, the distance or the exposure of the mountain, I love testing my physical and mental aptitude.
Hiking provides a platform for me to mindfully build strength and resilience in the face of adversity.
I choose to step out there and push these limits and that’s where the magic happens. It doesn’t stop there either, we carry these lessons through our everyday life, the teaching learn on the trails is a steadfast reminder of your capabilities.
This mental power is infused to the core of who you are.
The mindfulness to appreciate the beauty when sometimes it feels like there isn’t any.
Gratitude for the simple things in life and appreciation for the trimmings.
Hiking helped me through the past few years. It gave me a place to explore, unpack and reflect on who I was and who I wanted to be.
There is no truer adventure than self-discovery.
In the last 3 years, I have journaled and kept diaries. They serve as a sounding board mostly, a place where I am free to express all the emotions, unload onto the paper without hurting my loved ones.
I then explore what was behind it and why. Am I highly reactive? Did someone hurt a nerve? Why is that a trigger for me? What is the lesson behind the pain? I start to unpack a little and discover more about myself in the process of reflection.
I love understanding the WHY of everything. It’s also WHY I will always be a student. I love learning new things, opening new doors and exploring. It’s what I do and what I love. It drives me.
To say that the last 3 years have been a roller coaster is a gross understatement. I recently flicked through the pages of my diaries, 2017-2019 and I can adamantly say that I barely recognise the woman at the other end of the pen. I feel deep sadness for her and bring tears to my eyes reading her words. I wish I could give her the strength that I have now. Hindsight right?!
I poured my heart and soul onto the pages. My rage, deep sadness, insecurities, fear and shame were all there creating the narrative of this story.
Slowly as I flick through the pages, I see a shift in her, in me. The broken woman I was, madly scribbling her thoughts into words to find an understanding of my circumstances.
I start to see gratitude and mindfulness filter into the pages. I see where I have learned to create the distance to become more pro-active rather than reactive; to consider. I see tremendous growth spiritually, a deeper connection with my partner now husband, with my girls.
A better understanding of why things happened the way they did.
The anger has dissipated, I needn’t raise my voice to be heard but through the actions I take
.
The sadness embraced and appreciated for what it taught me.
Insecurities scrutinised and negative self-beliefs challenged.
The fear becomes courage.
Acceptance overcame shame and forged a new way of being.
Reflecting on these years, where I was and where I am now I know I wouldn’t be without tremendous heartache and pain. The power of the written word should not be underestimated.
Write, reflect and revisit. It will be the wildest adventure you will ever undertake!
My favourite quote from 2017;
“Embrace those parts of yourself that you’ve skilfully avoided until now.
That’s your true adventure”
GINA GREENLEE
Do you Journal? Do you keep them…
Amanda x